Friday, July 13, 2012

Yesterday I Ate A Lot

Day 5 -  I am ready to do my overeating inventory.  I dread it, but I know it is necessary.  I will post some of it here.  For example, I eat when I'm lonely, I eat when I'm bored.  I eat when I am at social gatherings where people eat.  Am I allowed that one?  Hmmm. 

At any rate, I eat a lot.  Yesterday I was not having a good day.  I had no gas to go anywhere except the grocery store, so I had to sit at home all day.  So I "needed" lots of comfort food.  So I ate and ate and....  Well, I think you get the picture.

Today I had to go sell books just to get gas money, so I'm trying to stay positive and not feel sorry for myself.  If I get into the fear and self pity I know my day will be crappy, so I don't need that.  I will try and focus on the good things about today. 

Mornings are usually good.  I eat a small breakfast and don't eat until the afternoon.  Then it seems to be a gradual progression to the pigging out by late night.  I hate that part.  Someone told me it may be because I am lonely and need comforting at night.  If that is the case, and it may be, then food is a poor substitute for a warm and loving person.  Ok, if I keep on with that train of thought I will get depressed. 

Wish me luck, and pray for me.  This ain't easy. 

  

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